I Heard The Abuse, But I Also Felt The Love – Antonio Rüdiger

For five years and five months, Chelsea’s Antonio Rüdiger leaves a heartfelt message to his teammates and all Chelsea fans.

“I don’t like goodbyes. But I will try to make this one special, from the heart. MoActually, I have to tell you a story before I tell you a story. This is the African side of me. We have to take our time”.

In his speech, he talked about the “humble” Ngolo Kante whose humility surpasses all.

“I have to tell a quick story about one of the nicest guys in football” he said.

“No one is that cool all the time. It’s impossible. Then I met N’Golo.”

Antonio Rüdiger also talked about the love at Chelsea, his teammates and genuine friendship and most importantly, the champions league finals against Manchester City.

“The trophies that I have won here – they are nice, for sure. But what really made Chelsea a special place were the friendships. We were more than teammates. So many of these guys — NG, Kova, Ziyech, Lukaku — they are like my brothers. That’s very rare in football, honestly. And if there is one moment that sums everything up for me, it would be the scene in the toilets after we won the Champions League Final.”

Below is an extract from his lengthy speech:

But when you are hungry, nothing is impossible. It is the ones who are starving, the ones who have nothing to lose, who are the most dangerous. When Tuchel came in as manager and gave me a chance, it was a new life for me. Actually, he did something right away that I think a lot of managers could learn from. It had nothing to do with tactics. He just came up to me and he said, “Toni, tell me about yourself.”

I remember the night before the final, we were at the hotel in Porto, and me, NG, Zouma and Ziyech went to pray after dinner. Usually, after we finish our prayers, we sit around and talk and laugh for a little bit. But everyone was just so focused, and it was very quiet. I remember we had on our tracksuits, and it had the date of the final stitched across the chest — MAY 29, 2021. 

That was when it sunk in, like: Wow. We’re here. We just looked at each other and said, “Inshallah, tomorrow we will be champions.” Then we said good night and went to bed. 

So to be honest, I slept like a baby before the Champions League Final, and when I woke up, I felt invincible. With my family behind me, and with food on my table, I cannot lose. 

The match itself was beautiful, because we won against an incredible City team by defending as a unit and hitting them on the counter. We fought for our lives, and in the end, we were champions. At the final whistle, I was running around like mad, and Tuchel just happened to be coming my way, and I gave him a big hug. That was a special moment for me, and I will always be thankful to him, because he gave me a chance when I was left for dead. 

When we got back to the dressing room, the boys were having the champagne celebration, and so a few of us who are practicing Muslims went into the bathroom to have our peace. Me, NG, Ziyech and Zouma locked ourselves in the toilets, and we were looking at our medals, and then looking at one another, shaking our heads. 

And I will never forget this….

NG had the biggest smile on his face. 

“Wow,” he said. “We really did it.” 

And he started laughing, like only he laughs. 

When NG laughs, you cannot help but feel pure joy. All four of us started laughing like little kids. That moment in the bathroom, for me, is forever. 

I leave this club with a heavy heart. It has meant everything to me. Even this season, with all the complications, has been enjoyable. Football is football. We are blessed to play a game for a living that we would play for free anyway. In fact, when the financial restrictions were being rumored, we were all laughing about having to take a bus or a smaller plane or whatever to the matches. I mean, a small plane? 

Oh no!!! What am I going to do? 

Come on. Do you know where I come from? A small plane is still a privilege. Honestly, a bus to Manchester sounds kind of cool. Me and the boys would have made it fun, for sure. 

But actually, I want to leave you with a final memory that is bittersweet. Sometimes the things that have the most impact on you are not all good, or all bad. For me, this memory is simply Chelsea.

It happened in 2019, after City smashed us 6–0 at the Etihad. To be honest, they murdered us. It was embarrassing. After the final whistle, I walked over to the traveling Chelsea fans to raise my hands and apologize. As I walked over, I expected them to boo. But they were all on their feet clapping. Even in such a bad moment, they had our back.

I was shocked. 

I put my hands up, like, Sorry, sorry, sorry.  

As I got closer, this one guy in the crowd started shouting abuse at me. He was maybe five meters away, looking me right in the eyes. Listen, I have heard abuse all my life, but this was different. It was really personal. I shouted to him, “Hey, if you want to talk, then come down here and we can have a conversation.” 

Of course, he didn’t even take one step.  Immediately, he stopped shouting. And what was remarkable to me was that all the fans around him turned to him and said, “Hey, what are you doing? He’s coming here to apologize. What’s wrong with you?” 

The fans — the real fans — started cheering for me even louder. 

“Rudi! Rudi! Rudi!”

That was really powerful. We had lost 6-nil, but all these people were still standing up to the hatred of this one idiot. 

“Come on, Rudi! Come on, mate!!!” 

It was so overwhelming that even the idiot started clapping, too. The other fans literally made him clap and apologize to me. I will never forget that. Never. 

There is hatred in the football world, for sure. That’s a fact. I have experienced the worst of it. But there is also a lot of joy, too. At Chelsea, I experienced both extremes. 

Yes, I heard the abuse.

But I also felt the love. 

At the end of the day, the light was stronger than the darkness. 

For that, I will always be Chelsea. 

Thank you, 

Rudi

SOURCE: The Players Tribune